“About damn time POTR!” the internet declares.
I hear you all proclaiming loud and proud. Why thank you. I knew you all had my back.
“So why now? Have you had enough of this contrived DNC/RNC monopoly on our unelected political hack’s Gerrymandered system?”
Possibly my dear friends, but not entirely. I have a far more stimulating desire for forming my own political party.
“Well then out with it man! We must know of this immediately.”
I’m thinking of forming my own political party now because I have thought up the best fraking name ever.
“HUH. That’s a bit weak don’t you think?”
Shit no. I’m naming it ‘The After Party’.
Think about it……………. Works on a couple levels.
“Well I’m sober now so you may have to explain it. The POTR’s ideas usually only make sense when we are all drunk.”
True, true dat. But really this is a sober idea. So think about this:
1. The After Party comes “after” the DNC/RNC. Makes perfect sense there.
2. We can call it “TAP” for short. As in, playing taps to the other political wonks.
3. I’ll have plenty of Libertarian support so clearly “party” applies.
4. Everyone always says “The DNC” or “The RNC” so we’ll be save folks tons of time by just putting “the” in the name to begin with. See how we think of the little people in TAP. It’s that subliminal shit that keeps people in line.
5. Millennials will always go for attending The After Party so we’re catching the young voters even if the have no idea who we are. They won’t care anyway.
6. The Gen X crowd is always pissed they never got to go to The After Party so we’ll offer babysitting at all our rallies, comp them three free drinks and offer an Uber ride home. Score we got them clean and clear with that!
7. When we debate with DNC/RNC candidates we demand a three drink minimum consumption before starting the taking of the questions nonsense. Let the people see what the DNC/RNC stooges “really” mean when they are loosed up a bit with the liquor talking. Our TAP candidates are proficient drunken yarn tellers and the masses will demand even more air time. Ah man I could go on and on. I’m loving this idea. We need a TAP logo. Anyone know who did that new Hillary Campaign logo by the way? I don’t want to hire that clown who did the crossover between a hospital and bus stop sign for her at all though. It suuuucked. Really it’s pretty lame. I just know after he did that work for her campaign I’m sure as shit he’s a guy who really needs to join TAP. I know you do to.
Are you ready for change/progress/taking back/supporting (insert random cause here)/saving the (insert cute animal name here)/stopping (insert random bad crap here)? Then TAP is the place for you my brothers and sisters.
Don’t delay. Join my…. I mean….. The After Party cause now.